DAY 01/75: You cannot begin to understand how difficult was it to take this photo, create this collage, watch myself having let go and putting it out there in public!
But, it had to be done.
I had let something else become the priority of everything I do.
This something became my mission while I stopped sleeping, started eating unhealthy.
I allowed my mental wellness be compromised to stay committed to a mission that I was not even real part of. It was a mission where I was just a tool, an equipment, a ‘means to the end goal’ but the goal did not involve me in any shape or form. I was disposable from the minute I was put to work.
The mission succeeded.
As I lost self confidence, self worth, and yet kept creating magic for the mission that had no place for me, and kept serving my clients with my best all along.
I was winning and I was losing. The losses were bigger than the wins.
So I had to stop and make a decision: To reclaim my self worth, my power and my joy!
It wasn’t a quick or eas
y decision but I knew I had to take up the #75Hard challenge!
This isn’t about physical fitness or releasing weight, because frankly neither of them are a challenge for me. In general I maintain both well, until I lost myself in the mission I was never more than a ‘disposable asset’ in.
This is about self discipline, control, determination and challenging the status quo of life. This is about mental strength and emotional intelligence to dream despite the hardships, heartbreaks and setbacks. This is about reclaiming my Sexy, Strong, Go-Getter self back!
I heard a barrage of judgement, advisory and warnings coming from all sides but if you know me, you know that more than anyone else it’s the self critique and self doubt that only ever allowed me to fall. I may have considered doing this out of trying to cope with my hurt, but I am beginning it to reclaim my worth, on my terms, without regrets or anger. I am not doing this for those who hurt me, betrayed me or used me. I am doing it for those who believed in me and still do, without ever doubting my being. And, I am doing this for me.
I am taking the 75Hard Challenge as a Mental accomplishment challenge.
I am putting myself first. I am not ready to hang out with hospital ER staff over and again. as kind and funny as they are. I am changing this. Not for others, not for proving anything to anyone but to put myself first and celebrate my own life – because I am worth it!
I am doing this so if anyone out there understands this, feels this and needs this, can do it too, for themselves, for owning their worth, without apologies.
You can watch my entire journey on my website or my YouTube Channel starting August 21, 2020. Don’t forget to subscribe and turn-on the notifications so you don’t miss out any updates.
I cannot claim to be an ‘almostNakedCEO’, ‘Entrepreneur Maker’ and ‘Individual Tenacity Advisor’ if I don’t allow my vulnerability to be seen and my fight against my own fears be witnessed out in open as I challenge the negativity and reclaim the powerful mindset of a change maker!
I am doing this for me and you with Clarity, Truth, Courage and Resilience #CTCR, so let’s
Side Note: I started on Monday but did not do read of 10 pages before day ran out, and only got to 6th page and the clock won. I am going to do this right, however many times it takes.